Dying in DnD – Too Many Frus

In my opinion, too many people are afraid of dying in DnD. It’s not that bad. In fact, sometimes it needs to happen. It is best to just embrace that fact and fail those death saves. Keep the cleric as far away as possible.

I am actually currently seeking death for one of my characters. Her name is Fru. I have way too many of her. One of her has to go.

Fru is a deep gnome wizard. I fell in love with her, hard, a few months ago and can’t stop playing her. It’s gotten way out of control. Look at all those Frus! (points to the image directly below).

dying in DnD
I have 14 different Fru characters in my D&D Beyond character collection. Something needs to be done.

Which One Am I Today?

While Fru is adorable, playing her has become a real challenge. At the start of each of my sessions, it takes me 10 minutes to pull up the right character sheet.

I have to ask everyone “what level are we and what class am I?” It is the only way I can sort them out. They all look the same. And, obviously, they all have the same name. Then, once I figure out which Fru I am, I have to try and remember what that Fru did last time. 

For example, in one campaign, Fru has an owl named Rocky, a flaming sword and lots of money. In the other, she is dirt poor and has a frog she despises. It is very offensive to my DMs when I get the two of them confused. They think I haven’t been paying attention. I’m trying, I really am. But because Fru has the same personality in all my games, I forget which one I am.

So last week I started scouting out which of my DMs would be the most likely to agree to kill off one of my Frus.

Niall said “no” right away. He had already killed my first character, a rogue named Figgy, at my request only a few months ago. Figgy had to go because I kept thinking she was Fru – because I have so many. I kept using the wrong voice and saying the wrong things. It was embarassing.

No Carla, no way! The only time Fru is gonna die is when I say she is gonna die. Got it? You just can't keep dying like this! We got rid of Figgy because you wanted Fru. Now you don't want her anymore? No. Just NO.
Niall the DM
(and Fru fan)

Maybe Craig ...

I think my best bet might be Craig – who runs my Dragon of Icespire Peak campaign. He is ridiculously British and is compelled to be polite at all times. (Unlike Niall)

Would Craig be so rude as to turn me down? I don’t know. I don’t think so. I should ask him next.

I really, really don’t want to have to go to dear Lina. Fru just joined her group. She hasn’t yet had much of a chance to seriously annoy the other characters. Fru really wouldn’t want to die without properly annoying at least two of her companions first.

Dying in DnD

This is Fru

Fru is a 14-year-old deep gnome wizard. She looks exactly like this. (I had her commissioned because she is so darn cute.) Fru has ADHD, has a great deal of trouble being quiet and is dangerously impulsive. If she gets upset, she might just pull out a fireball and then aim very badly. Party members learn quickly to stay out of her line of sight.

Dying in DnD - Exactly what is 'melee' fighting?

Dying in DnD can be super fun. I know. I’ve done it several times in my few short years of playing. It is especially fun if you plan it out with your DM ahead of time. Don’t tell anyone else – only you and the DM know.

Perhaps one of my favorite player moments so far was when Scott, the Dungeon Master of Death, killed off my Magna. He was the DM for my first real D&D campaign

Magna was the second character I had ever built. I had no idea what I was doing. After gathering the list of classes already in the party, and getting my son to explain to me what “melee” fighting was, I determined a paladin was needed. 

What a stupid idea. I had no clue what I was doing with her weird collection of features and sort-of spells and clunky weapons. Smite? What the hell is Smite? Poor Scott was suffering almost as much as I was.

So he agreed to help me out.

"Oh sure Carla, I'd be happy to work with you on an epic death for Magna. She deserves it! It might take me a couple weeks to come up with a really nice way to send her off. But I've already got a few ideas."
Dungeon Master of Death

D&D players should not fear death. It can be fun. Image courtesy Warner Bros. Television


Scott delivered big time. He gave Magna, and the other party members, a great session. Magna was sent off in a heroic fashion. To be perfectly honest, she really didn’t deserve such an epic departure.

He gave everyone a portal, with some kind of temptation waiting for them on the other side. Each player got something different that tied in with their backstory. Decisions had to be made. The threat of death was everywhere. It was awesome.

I wish Fru could have such a thrilling experience. 

I need a plan. I need to get creative, think outside of the box …

Hey Scott. It's Niall's birthday on Sunday, a game day. So it will be kind of like a party. Wouldn't it be fun to surprise him and have you show up as some super badass NPC? Then Fru accidentally gets too close to said NPC and ... (problem solved)
Me (Carla Bumstead)
Who has too many Frus

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